In this blog post, I share some fantastic wedding planning advice from couples I’ve photographed.
Planning a wedding is exciting, overwhelming, joyful and occasionally ridiculous. After photographing more than 100 weddings, one thing stands out: couples learn a lot. So instead of sharing advice from my own perspective, I asked couples I’ve photographed to tell me what they wish they’d known. Their insights are gold.
To make things easy, the advice is split into two parts: planning the wedding and enjoying the day itself.
ADVICE ON PLANNING YOUR WEDDING
Stick to your values
So many couples said the same thing: stay true to what matters to you. When you keep your priorities clear, decisions become far simpler. Whether that means ditching traditional roles, choosing an unconventional venue or creating a relaxed, party-style day, lean into what feels right. As a bonus, guests always adjust, and on the day no one fixates on the details you changed.
Delegate and involve others
Planning becomes easier when you don’t do it alone. For example, many couples found it helpful to give small tasks to friends and family, especially those keen to be involved. Delegating early prevents overwhelm and also makes your people feel part of your day. Additionally, listen to your suppliers. They work weddings every week and know what actually matters in the real world.
Be realistic about your budget
Weddings can be expensive, so it helps to decide where you want to invest and where you’re happy to save. Several couples said they wished they hadn’t spent so much on things like favours, huge cakes or complicated décor. If a detail won’t change your experience of the day, you probably don’t need to spend big on it.
Plan together as a team
Working together makes the entire process smoother. Discuss ideas before booking viewings or tastings, and check in with each other before locking in decisions. Sometimes a disagreement simply means you haven’t found the right supplier yet. When you’re aligned, the planning becomes less stressful and far more enjoyable.
Stop obsessing over decorations
It’s easy to fall down a Pinterest hole, but nearly every couple admitted that their décor looked different on the day, and they honestly didn’t mind. Guests remember the atmosphere, not the shade of your napkins. Focus on the elements that shape the experience rather than the things that will be forgotten in a week.
Start early with the big things
Venues, caterers, bands and photographers book up quickly, especially in Oxfordshire. Because of this, couples recommended securing the major suppliers early. Once those are confirmed, you can relax a little. It also helps to use a shared spreadsheet or planning document to keep track of decisions, payments and deadlines.
Stay organised with tools that work for you
Good organisation reduces stress. Many couples recommended using Google Sheets, Trello, Paperless Post, The Knot, or wedding websites like Wix. These tools simplify RSVPs, menu choices, guest lists and budgets. Choose whatever feels intuitive and keep everything in one place.
Choose suppliers who feel right
Recommendations from friends and family are always helpful. Beyond that, research suppliers whose style matches your vision. Meet them, ask questions and trust your instincts. If someone doesn’t make you feel at ease from the start, move on.
Be confident about skipping tradition
Couples shared so many examples of choosing their own path: colourful outfits, mixed-gender bridal parties, non-traditional ceremonies, or completely rewriting the script. When something doesn’t feel meaningful, you’re allowed to do it differently.
Most importantly, try to enjoy the planning
The journey to your wedding is part of the story. Although there will be stressful moments, the build-up also creates memories you’ll talk about for years. A relaxed mindset makes everything easier.
WEDDING PLANNING ADVICE FOR ENJOYING THE DAY
Delegate on the day
By the time the day arrives, you shouldn’t be running around. Give responsibility to people you trust, whether that’s a best friend, a sibling or someone from the wedding party. When others handle the logistics, you can focus on enjoying the celebration.
Take small moments together
The day goes quickly, so intentionally pause to be present with each other. Couples said these tiny moments became some of their strongest memories. Whether it’s stepping outside for a breather or stealing a quiet minute between events, it helps you stay grounded.
Eat and pace yourself with drinks
Several couples mentioned how easy it is to get carried away with champagne. A little food goes a long way toward keeping you comfortable and clear-headed. A well-fed couple has far more fun.
Stay calm when things go “off script”
Something always goes slightly off plan, and that’s normal. When you stay relaxed, the small imperfections simply become part of the story. Most couples said the unexpected moments turned into their fondest memories.
Let yourself enjoy every minute
Your wedding day is for you both. When you relax, everyone else follows your lead. Smile, take in the atmosphere, let people look after you and allow yourself to feel all the joy in the room.
WEDDING PLANNING ADVICE: FINAL THOUGHTS
After photographing weddings for years and hearing so many couples share their experiences, everything boils down to three key points:
- Keep hold of what truly matters to you both.
- Let go of the idea of perfection.
- Enjoy the day you’ve worked so hard to create.
I hope this wedding planning advice gives you reassurance, clarity and a little extra excitement as you plan your Oxfordshire wedding. If you’ve only just got engaged, you may want to start here: WEDDING PLANNING. WHERE TO START WHEN YOU’VE JUST GOT ENGAGED.